When people first hear that there’s a close relation between your experience with dating apps and how professional you are in your career, they have a hard time believing this.
So I wanted to get to the point of that, as not only my online dating life and skills are a proof of that, but multiple studies.
Here are the exact ways in which meeting people online has helped me, and can help you, succeed in your professional life:
1. You feel more comfortable approaching new people.
Social anxiety is a big issue these days, and it can make or break your career success too.
The only known solution for that is enough practice. And so that you don’t need to go over the whole awkwardness and unpleasant feelings to do it in real life, there’s the digital world.
Dating apps can help you deal with this over time, and even start approaching people.
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No rush, of course. It took me weeks to even answer to people in the beginning. But it gets easier over time.
Creating a profile and just putting yourself out there and seeing who else is doing the same is comforting. Also, the shyness is at its lowest level as you’re at home, no one says you need to meet with the person on the other side of the screen anytime soon. You can just answer and exchange friendly messages whenever you feel like.
That’s how I did it, at least.
To some this comes naturally and in a few days they are already out on a date with someone they met online.
Whatever your approach, be sure that answering to someone you don’t know from the opposite gender will also make you feel comfortable with sending the first message to someone else next time.
Which, when in a real-life situation, is the valuable skill of approaching people first. It shows confidence, character, no fear of rejection, and in the professional world can lead to countless opportunities.
2. Networking is everything.
In life and in business, networking is crucial. You don’t need to know anyone when you’re just starting out, but you will need to focus on meeting people, forming relationships, building trust, and ultimately helping each other by working together. Plus, in-between there are multiple benefits that you can’t even predict, such as a new friend introducing you to someone he knows, who turns out to like your work philosophy and experience and offers you to work on a big project together.
To expand your circle, you need to be everywhere, and dating apps are no exception. You don’t need to imagine that every next person whose profile you see is your soulmate. It can be a friend, a business partner, a potential client, or else.
Yes, that’s the kind of world we live in and professional and personal life are so closely related.
3. You become a better communicator.
Another thing dating apps helped me with is to brush up on my communication skills.
I didn’t really know what to say and to whom in the beginning, my timing wasn’t right, I wasn’t asking the right questions and was overthinking when having to answer.
Now, I do things differently.
I’m picky with the people I chat with, of course. But when I text or someone texts me first, I’m just being myself and answer right away. And because that’s the best state of mind when socializing, it always works.
After every next chat, or even meeting, I’m getting closer to realizing what I don’t want in a person from the opposite gender, what questions work best, what topics to discuss based on how well we know each other, and I even experiment by provoking with questions when least expected, or sharing just enough so I can leave more for the next time.
It’s fun and you get better at it over time.
But there’s no other place to do that freely other than dating apps.
There are 25 million people on Tinder solely, so wait no more and create a profile today.
4. You stop fearing rejection.
After contacting people online for some time using such apps, I realized that rejection is absolutely okay. I mean, come on. There’s no way you can like all the people that like you. And the opposite is also true.
I started looking at this fact from another angle.
Turns out online dating is the 2nd most popular way to meet potential partners, so imagine how many people get rejected every minute.
That made me accept rejection as part of the process. There’s no way to meet the right fit if you don’t match with tens of others first who’ll have at least one thing you don’t like about them, or a topic you won’t agree on, or something else.
Then, every time this happened, I smiled and – in my mind – thanked the person for showing this early on and not wasting both of our time. After all, I wanna deal with the right people only.
Not only was this a good life lesson, but it also helped me exceed at work.
Before, I used to feel disappointed and took it personally when someone wasn’t happy with my work, a client chose another company, an idea of mine was turned down, a job interview didn’t go well, or else.
Now, this is not an issue for me. I’m excited to move on in the right direction and try something else, that has a bigger chance of being exactly what I’m supposed to do and the next logical step in my career.
So, if you’re looking for a way to win the game of dating (it’s a numbers game, after all), and become more confident, a better communicator and advance in your career, then this is the way.