No matter how compatible you are, at some point, you and your mate will find yourselves at opposite sides of an opinion. You are at a crossroads where you can either argue or compromise.
How do you create a positive outcome out of a complicated situation? Follow these 7 steps:
1. Really listen to what each of you actually wants.
We can get so heated that we stop listening and lose perspective. Find out exactly what would make your partner happy and then voice your own desires.
2. Create a common goal.
The art of diplomacy is not about resolving all differences, but about creating agreement. What can you both agree to or on? What do you both want? Create a common goal when facing this situation.
3. Look for what is possible.
Rather than focusing on what you cannot or will not do, look for what is possible and start to inch towards each other. Embrace your power to negotiate (without becoming a score keeper). Relationships are give and take. If you were to compromise to please your partner, what could they do in another situation or category of your lives to make you feel like you were gaining too?
4. Make a clear plan.
We tend to forget what was said at the time of agreement and statistics say that people will tend to hear what they want to hear – so make it clear to avoid future arguments.
5. Be grateful.
Compromise can often lead to resentment if we start to feel the sting of what we are giving up. Take a moment to be grateful for what your partner is giving up for you and let them do the same. The art of self-sacrifice is about giving up something good for something better.
6. Move forward with a positive attitude.
If you have already decided you are going to compromise, don’t be a party pooper about it. Keep your chin up and make the best of it. You increase your chances to enjoy yourself and take the pressure and guilt off your partner.
7. Review the outcome.
Once the event or situation is over, take the time to discuss and review it. Relationships are also about our ability to influence each other. How have you grown from this experience? When faced with the same situation again, would you make the same compromise or strike a new one to ensure neither party feels like they are losing themselves.
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