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CHAKRA
Dating 1

Meditate Your Way To A Great Dating Balance

By Dr. Paulette Sherman @kpaulet · On July 21, 2015

Let’s face it:  dating makes most people anxious.  Either you fear being rejected, having to reject someone, getting your heart crushed or meeting someone new…someone you might not remotely like!  Some days you may need a tool to help you keep going; something to help you be remain centered and sane in the middle of dating chaos.

Meditation has long been known to quiet the mind, to center us and to bring us to a more peaceful state where we can connect with our higher self and the essence of others.

Some people mediate by saying a word or mantra but often beginners prefer a guided meditation, so they can focus upon someone’s voice or narrative.  It can be easier to focus on someone’s voice and a storyline than to sit in complete silence, left to our own devices!

So, today I will provide a written meditation to guide you through your chakras, to help you relax, clear and center your energy before a date.

chakraFirst, what are the chakras? Chakras are wheels of energy in your body that are like data banks that record specific types of energy. Each chakra is associated with a certain color, function and aspect of consciousness.  Picturing these seven energy centers of yours will guide you to release any toxic beliefs and feelings about dating and yourself in each energy center, so that you feel centered, peaceful and positive before going out on your date.  And, this will only take ten minutes so I hope that you find it helpful.

Imagine 7 beautiful colorful wheels of light in your body that help you to process things at your best:

 

chakra

ROOT CHAKRA:  This is the center of Security, Needs and Groundedness.  It is located at the end of your spine, near your tailbone and the color is red.   Imagine roots going into the earth from this energy center; roots that make you feel comfortable in your own skin, safe and loved, no matter what’s happening.  Connecting here will help you feel grounded and comfortable on any date.  Breathe out any murky colors of feeling unsafe, insecure, flighty or fake in this energy center.  Breathe in the red light and feel deep comfort and confidence in yourself now. Good.

chakra

2nd CHAKRA: This is the center of your Sexuality, Creativity and your need to Control.  It is found at the center of your abdomen just below the navel, about two to three inches below the bellybutton.  Here we hold issues of allowing ourselves to be nurtured.  It is the area of trust and relationships and it’s the color orange.  Here you can say, YES!’ to what you most want in love and partnership and know that you can create it!  Here you can be magnetic, trusting, sensual and attractive.  Release anything smoky-colored in this energy center, like old hurt from past relationships or negative emotions and breathe in perfect orange light of trust from source and creativity.

CHAKRA

3rd CHAKRA:  This is the center of your Power and Self-Esteem.  It is located by your bellybutton- below your breastbone and slightly to the left. Here we record all criticism.  This chakra is the center of boundaries and our sense of personal dignity.  It is often logical, suspicious and responsibility-bound, according to author Donna Eden. The color is yellow.  Here you can remember that you are powerful and worthy of creating whatever relationship you most want.  Here you can know you are worthy of great respect and maintain your sense of self, boundaries and self-esteem in a love relationship.  Breathe out anything muddy colored in this energy center like feelings of insecurity and helplessness related to dating.  Breathe out any feelings of unworthiness or fear of being criticized or overwhelmed.  Good.  Now breathe in the clear yellow light of your personal power and feel invincible.

chakra

4th CHAKRA: This is your heart chakra- the center of Self-Love and Unconditional Love.  It is located in the middle of your breastbone and above the chest and is the color green.  It is our heart and emotions that carries our electromagnetic energy, according to author Carolyn Myss, and we need our heart center engaged to create anything.  You must engage your heart chakra to create love in your life.  Your fourth chakra reflects how you feel about things.  Feel how wonderful it is to love and be loved.  Imagine what you can share with a great partner and how much you’d both give to enrich each other and the world.  Good.  Now breathe out any muddy colors in your heart chakra like past pain, fear of being open to love, of being known and fear of risking connection again.  Resolve to open your heart and breathe in the clear green light of love now.

Related: Hello Heat Chakra

chakra

5th CHAKRA:  The Throat chakra is the color blue and this is the seat of your Voice.  It is located in your throat area.  The throat chakra is your unique expression in the world.  You can speak your truth so all you speak is loving wisdom and kindness.  Your words connect you to others in resonance and harmony and love. As you breathe out, release any stuck energy.  Release any fear of speaking your truth, saying the wrong thing, being boring or long-winded or being judged on dates.  Breathe in the clear blue energy of your throat chakra and know your truth is powerful.

CHAKRA

6th Chakra: This intuitive center is the color indigo.  This is your Third Eye.  It is located between your eyes in the middle of your forehead.  It is here that you see symbols, meaning and guidance.  Here you can release any murky colors like negative old connections from you to others and from others to you and release lower perceptions of relationships and the opposite sex.  Maybe you’ve been wrong about dates before and now you don’t trust your intuition.   But your intuition is strong, clear and good and you can breathe in a higher perception of love and dating.  Here you can trust your intuition again and know that you will recognize your soul mate in a deep way.  This center can guide you towards who is right for you.

chakra

7th CHAKRA:  This crown chakra is violet and represents Divine Wisdom and our connection to Spirit.  It is located at the top of your head.  The colors can be purple, and gold.  Here all is One.  You can ask for divine assistance here and trust that there is a divine plan even when it doesn’t look that way.  Here we can remember that we are all One, so even if someone isn’t going to be your spouse, be kind and realize we are all from one source.

If it’s murky in this center and you feel there is no divine plan for you and that you’re chosen to be unlucky in love then just let go those limiting beliefs now. Instead breathe in violet light and trust that you will meet the One.  Declare that you are willing to receive divine wisdom to get help with this.  Breathe in the violet energy to receive divine wisdom. As you breathe out, release any blocks to this chakra so that you’re connected to God and your higher self and to all others.

chakra

If you want to learn more about the chakra system, authors and teachers who do a great job describing this are Sonia Choquette, Donna Eden, Carolyn Myss, Christopher Dilts, and Anodea Judith.  I would recommend Carolyn Myss’s Energy Anatomy, Anodea Judith’s Wheels of Life (and her other books), chakra workshops with Donna Eden and posts by Christopher Dilts on www.Askanangel.org.

I’ve also created two dating meditation CDs with several meditations to address various aspects of dating, if you prefer to listen to them instead of read this one.  You can find it here: Healing Relaxation Meditation  as well as a CD of meditations I made specifically for career women who are dating: Relationship Meditations For Successful Career Women

You can use this meditation I’ve made for you for fun and to prepare for your dates when you feel nervous or are not quite yourself.  Hopefully it will bring you back to your center and essence and remind you how wonderful you are!

Happy Dating!

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Dr. Paulette Sherman

Dr. Paulette Kouffman Sherman is a psychologist, dating coach and the author of “Dating from the Inside Out” published by Atria Books and “The Book of Sacred Baths: 52 Bathing Rituals to Revitalize Your Spirit,” published by Llewellyn. She has a private practice in Manhattan and Brooklyn and she does dating coaching internationally by phone. Check out her many books on Amazon and learn more about her dating coaching at Dr.PauletteSherman.com and MyDatingandRelationshipSchool.com.

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1 Comment

  • Paulette Sherman : @kpaulet | RealDating.Biz says: July 22, 2015 at 4:31 pm

    […] Here’s my article:https://www.eligiblemagazine.com/2015/07/21/meditate-your-way-to-a-great-dating-balance/ … […]

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